as I sit here in my empty apartment a strange feeling settled over me, it feels like insecurity mixed with sadness and excitement - we are moving home, town and country. All I have is packed and carted and each room echoes the nostalgia of a hollow drum played to an empty square village. The rooms that were once the helms of existence where critical decisions were analyzed, celebrated the victories and losses cried (with liquid encouragement of course) are now empty, helpless, with nothing to offer.
As I look around, I find myself wondering why have things that you own around you can make you feel secure. Is it simply that (the physical application) the weight of our possession serves as an anchor for our land, which prevents us from floating off to the whims of a capricious society that is otherwise out of control? Or do our possessions and quests to shed light on internal property needs and requirements
What do we buy when we buy a product or service ?; Is the physical item itself or the feeling that section promises to give? For example, what you are buying when you buy a car, a huge system of metal carcass and fancy speed or the feeling of comfort, exclusivity and excitement the brand promise? What to buy a dress, you pay for the textile industry and manufacturing or attention and sense of well-being to wear this dress could bring? And how about cosmetic creams and other things - Are we buy baths lard or some ridiculous promise of security and acceptance inspired by our endless youth
Assuming that our possessions will shed light on our desires and needs - how could we use this in everyday life?
First of all, we could differentiate between a "need" and "want" because the line between the two becomes quite fuzzy and that's when we have trouble with the possession and possession . A "need" is the feeling inside you that must be met and a 'want' is how you choose to satisfy the "need" so that you are satisfied (or think you are met until the illusory sense completion slips between the fingers). For example, you are thirsty, you feel uncomfortable, you need '' to adjust your thirst to feel at ease and you can do so with water, coke or beer. You decide you want 'water ... you feel is set (at least temporarily).
"needs" are universal, they are what makes us human, we all share the same "needs" and aim to satisfy. The need to respond to these "needs" is what creates this energy we call motivation. On the other hand, "wants" are personalized, individualistic and shaped or influenced by the society, especially the advertising, marketing and peer pressure. "Wants" are a way of expressing our individualism and all this can be fun, it is important to remember that only "needs" can be satisfied. The more you have, the more you want, the more you want, the more you want -. Trying to fix the "wants" leads to a life running in a tyranny of unnecessary when you feel controlled by the fear of losing your property
Second, we could regularly adjust and learn to identify our "needs "being attentive and taking time everyday to sit quietly, eliminate all noise of the company created by the media, advertising and peer pressure, so we recognize our own feelings and inner voice.
Finally, we could learn to make a habit of identifying the needs we are trying to meet a specific purchase, then ask how steady this tactic / option and how can I meet this need ? The trick is to remain as objective as possible.
So back to me sitting in my empty apartment - I realized that the feeling I felt was telling me about my needs. Like most people, I need security and a sense of belonging. How can I obtain safety and building belonging? Maybe talk to the husband to invest in an apartment or a house; a place called home. Is this not how we settle our need for security and belonging
Yes, a place called home - definitely important when you are half woman half Pakistani, German Nigerian whose husband decides work in China ...
Until next time, stay safe!